I quit my job at the bank today. I lost interest.
What is an Emo's favorite hobby?
Hanging in.
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
Friend: Why do you like Minecraft so much?
Me: Because I love miners!
So I was at the store and I saw a pretty Woman and i said hi and quickly she said i am not interested I have a husband and when i saw the woman again she said i need help i said no Call you husband KARMA đđđ
What's an emo's favorite game? Fruit Ninja.
A blind man went to a restaurant.
"Menu sir?" asked the owner. "I'm blind, just bring me one of your dirty forks, I will smell it and order." The confused owner went to the kitchen to retrieve a fork and returned to the blind man.
The blind man smelled the fork with a deep breath, "Yes I will have the lamb with seasoned potatoes and spring vegetables." Unbelievable, thought the owner. The blind man ate and left. Two weeks later the blind man returned. The owner, wanting to know how good his smell is, quickly went to the kitchen where his wife Brenda was cooking and said, "Do me a favor and rub this fork over your private part" which she did. He then goes to the blind man and gives him the fork. The blind man takes it and puts it to his nose and says, "Oh interesting! I never knew Brenda works here!"
"Gay Furry Femboys are cool."
I like fire trucks and monster trucks.
Can people please shut up about "male privileges"? There is no right that men have that women don't.
Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft.
Women have the right to choose parenthood; men do not.
Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children.
Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape.
Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime.
Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators.
Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of "women only" events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us.)
Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas.
Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner.
Women have the right to domestic violence shelters.
Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic dispute.
Women have the right to rape a man or boy, and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy, they can sue him for child support.
So it is women who have more rights.
So shut up, feminists, please.
Q: What do you call two nuns watching television?
A: Not very interesting.
My priest asked if anyone had any questions or anything interesting they wanted to say.
So I raised my hand, he said why donât you tell everyone what you have to say.
In front of the whole church I said I did not know Jesus Christ was the first scarecrow.
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because youâre a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, youâd be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because youâre really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, youâd be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
+What did bee who interested in philosophy said ? -to bee or not to bee
This is two heads.
Deaf. "Deep water." ""
- "78 years."
Are you interested again? ""
"If you go ... you are there."
"No. 85 is good."
What is the most important value? It does not take cheese.
Are you interested in it?
More than two boot branches.
I call this my great talk with Siri
Me : hey Siri give me and Ur Mom joke
Siri: My mother ? Huh?
Me: Did I stutter?
Siri: Interesting question
Me : it wasnât a question
Siri: Iâm not sure I understand?
Me: you should understand
Siri: hmm... Is there something else I can help with?
Me: no you b***
What do you call a nut who loves the game of chess?
A chess-nut.
Hi guys, I am starting a Gwen funny club. If you wanna join, then just type so here. Hope you have fun!
Oh, and also can be a Gwen name club for Gwens only!
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."
