Insult jokes
You are so ugly when you gave birth to your baby, you gave it carpet burn.
"Why is your head big?"
"'Cause you're a ball."
When someone says: "You're a mistake."
Say: "The only mistake I see is right in front of me."
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
Blitz: "HOLD ON! You better move that pussy wagon right now, or I’m gonna..."
Vortex: "You'll do what?"
Blitz: "Or I'll... uh... uh, I- I'll call HR!"
*Silence, then Verosika/me, Blitz, and Vortex bust into laughter. And then back to seriousness*
Verosika/me: "Anyway, meet my new Hellhound... Vortex. Unlike you, he actually does his job well." *leaves and flips Blitz off* "Ta-ta fuck stain."
Your momma! OHHHHH!
Your hairline is so far back that when I wrote it on a chalkboard, it did not erase.
Your mother.
Sister: You're adopted.
Me: At least they wanted me, they must feel terribly bad cuz they had to keep you :(
This person ( :I ) It wasn't meant to be a joke; it was just to make space like your mother's ass in space because it's so big.
I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."
Your mom is so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.
Your mum's foreheads.
Your forehead goes back to when Burger King was Burger Prince.
Ur face.
My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.
Your hairline is so far back I learned about it in history class.
Ur dad
Omg, I'm sooooo sry!!!!!
Ur mom.
Oops my bad! 😬
Yo mama joke.