INS jokes
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
What's common in vampires and American kids?
They both don't get old.
What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?
A full house.
What happened to people in Hiroshima and Nagasaki? They swapped races.
My dad died in 9/11, he was a great pilot.
Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?
Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.
Your forehead is so big, the earth split in half!
Why is 10 scared?
Because it is in the huddle of 9/11.
Stephen Hawking is just in a role play. He died to a crash in Minecraft.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RCXD.
The tables in my class are straight, but I can’t say the same thing for your hairline.
If you tried to look at your hairline in a mirror, it would shatter into 100,000,000,000 pieces.
Putting WiFi in the morgue to enable live streaming.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common.
My sister's tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.
Why shouldn't orphans get a phone?
They would get stuck in an app because they can't find the home button.
How did the cookie 🍪 feel when he was dunked in milk?
Batter.
What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women?
The National Organization For Women has more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy.
I thought a waitress said to me, "You're good looking." In fact, she was asking if I'd like some pudding.
What do you call an Indian in a shower?
A cleaner.