INS jokes
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.
Why You should never poop on the floor in an Apple Store?
Because they don't have Windows. 🤢 🤣
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.
How many Emos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all just sit in the dark and cry.
One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.
Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"
Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
How do you know if a chick is too fat?
If you pull her pants down, her ass is still in them.
What do you get when you dip a duck in blue paint?
A very pissed duck.
When the teacher gives me an F on my exam,
but I have an AK-47 in my backpack.
*Is honestly the best policy.*
The highest level of trust in the world is when two cannibals are each giving each other blowjobs.
Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!
So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.
A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.
The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
What is the difference between an orphan and a candle?
One is used.
Have you ever thought about the fact that every market in Africa is a black market?
With the sentence "Die in Hölle," you can buy shoes in Germany.
I asked a person in a wheelchair if they wanted to fight. All I had to do is say, "Stand up!"