INS jokes
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
Hello! I'm Taylor, and this is my life story with me and my ex girl. So when I was little, I met this girl. Her name was Leah. We were besties for a while until I turned 13. Then I asked if she wanted to date me. She said yes!
But one day, in the middle of school, she was talking to another man!!!!!!! AND THEY HUGGED AND KISSED EACH OTHER ON THE CHEEK!!!!!! Then, she told me she hated me. I was so upset!!!!!!!! Whatever you do, don't follow the ugly rat!!!!!!!!! <3
I can explain Superman and Batman movies in one sentence.
Two orphans fighting in the rain.
Why can't orphans eat chips?
Because they come in family size.
Question: Do you know who Candis is?
Answer: Can dis dick fit in your mouth?
How tall does the grass grow in Germany?
Zis high!
Why can't pirates play cards in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.
A boy in nursery asked a girl out. She ran away crying in fear, so he just went back to teaching.
What do feminists and whores have in common?
Daddy issues.
My uncle died in 9/11. He was in the plane that crashed in the field.
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was an amazing pilot.
One knight, a king, and a queen went fishing. They each caught one fish, so how did three fish end up in the bucket?
One "knight"!!!
Why does the pancake team in baseball always win? Because they have the best batter.
Hello, Brudas, my name Badabeeyeabolamazoqanba. I, forty-eight-year man from Somalia. Sorry for bad England. I sold my wife for internet connect, and I am level thirteen in Roblacks. If you want to get batter in Roblacks, contact me at Gmail@borakoobama. Send me your bank account information and password. Than I well give you all the cotton you desire. Sorry for bad spelling. I kindergarden dropout.
If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Big hands.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
Because they'll get a hole in one!
You need to eat makeup on the inside because, friend, you're so ugly and you're not even pretty on the outside.
Why are there no guns in China? They might do some "ting wong!"
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There were two when we were kids, but now it’s a touchy subject.
Someone in the Twin Towers ordered two pizzas, plane?