INS jokes
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
What is red and cries and spins around and around?
- A baby in a microwave.
What do a small pair of underpants and a small dance room have in common?
No ballroom.
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
A kid in a wheelchair got hurt yesterday. I got detention yesterday because I told him to walk it off.
Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.
In reality, I like killing myself.
I was playing football and this guy comes to me, he was in a wheelchair.
We started playing rocket league.
What do you say to a depressed person on the ceiling?
Hang in there!
I farted in my grandma's breathing machine.
Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 comment = 1 kid in my microwave.
+1 share = 1 kid in my blender.
My attitude doesn't have to be the only reason I yell and roll my eyes in the back of my head.
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.
What do an open champagne bottle and an orphan have in common? They both lost their pop.
I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.
What does an orphan and a military man not have in common? Neither gets to go back home.
Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?
Because you can’t take medicine on an empty stomach.