Im jokes
I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.
I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?
After my wife died, I couldn't even look at another woman for 10 years.
But now that I'm out of jail, I can honestly say it was worth it!
Why did the skeleton have no friends?
He was a boner!
Heheheh!
Ah, see ya soon kiddo.
I'm going on break.
I'll give you some fried snow later!
My sister gives her hamster to my brother since she thinks I'm irresponsible, so I throw it out the window.
Two nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other, "I'm-a cashew!"
A man was taking a child into a dark forest.
The child said, "I'm scared!"
The man replied, "Well I have to walk home alone."
What will Reddit be without the robot logo?
Reddot.
I'm not a chef, but boy, are these days getting harder and harder to get through.
Sad to think about legend O.G. Mudbone being no longer with us.
I’m only curious how they closed his casket.
I’m old enough to remember innocent times when the worst headline was plane hijackers flying into buildings.
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a truck.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No, I'm not a poo, you're a poo.
Never attempt to foreshadow your own death, you may end up regretting it. You can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if I’m wrong.
Me: Hey, I’m your mom.
Orphan: Yay, you came back!
Me: Sike!
Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?
Friend 2: Yup.
Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?
Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.
Friend: Why?
Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?
I am a fruitcake. Why? Because I’m fruity and nutty. That’s the joke. Tada!
Yo mama so stupid.
When she was in mandarin class, she asked, "Where are the mandarins? I'm hungry."
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid.
Man: "Hang in there! I'm gonna get some help!"
Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said.
RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)
Daniel committed suicide five years ago today......
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
I'm doing a new thing where you say an object in the comments, and I will try to make a joke based off the object.
If you are interested, you can submit an object in the comments.
I will give the person credit each joke I do.