Ill jokes

I was the person that flew into the Twin Towers. I have two friends that are both twins, and whenever they speak, I tell them to shut up because if they don't, I'll make myself explode in them.

Mommy, mommy, why do I keep running around in circles?

Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!

Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*

All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?

People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!

People I say no to: (⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)

Why did the scarecrow get an award? He was outstanding in his field. Okay, I'll admit it's corny.

I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"

What did the iceberg say to the firefighter?

"Come close and I’ll knock you out cold!"

I tried my best to think of some puns, but I'm gonna have tibia honest: I don't have any puns left, but I'm pretty sternum, so I'll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine to do this.

Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.

"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race

Roses are red, violets are blue. You belong in a zoo, but don't worry, I'll be there too. Just not in a cage, I'll be laughing at you.

If someone says 67 one more time, I'll say 9/11 and swoop right under their feet like the Twin Towers.

Wordle be like (pt3)

Any future Wordle jokes I'll just put into one mega comp.

STUCK 💛🩶🩶🩶💛

FOLKS 🩶🩶🩶💛💚

MAKES 🩶🩶💚💚💚

YIKES 💛🩶💚💚💚

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Through highs and lows, I'll be here for you.

What did the rapper say to the microphone?

"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"

Roses are red, Violets are fine, You be the 6, I'll be the 9. 😏

I once masturbated in the bathroom.

I was looking for something, for a little help.

Looked in the wardrobe and found something perfect.

I'LL NEVER SEE A TOOTHBRUSH THE SAME WAY AGAIN!

Waitress: What can I get for you?

Me: I'll have a steak.

Waitress: How would you like it?

Me: Immediately!

Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?

What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.

P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.

2 7 73 53.

I'll give you time, figure it out.

A big guy told the small guy, "Do you want a little pill because you look ill, or should I smash you?"