If jokes

"5 dollars if a fat guy can find his penis."

If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?

If you drop soap on the floor, is the floor clean, or is the soap dirty?

What do you get if you do not eat? Dry.

Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?

Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...

It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between "antidote" and "anecdote," one of my best friends would still be alive.

Orphan: "I get all the A pluses and y'all bad!"

And then I told him: "If you feel so special, try telling your parents. You can't, can you?"

If a tomato is a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie?

If you were a fruit, you would be a fineapple.

If you were a vegetable, I would visit you in the hospital.

My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.

If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.

Listen, if my mom sees me on Roblox at 3 a.m., she said she would bang my head against the keyboardndfndfnnckvnksdvknkdsfnvbfw.

If you're looking at this, then look behind you!

What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?

Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.

Do they say you are what you eat?

That makes Bulma a VEGETARIAN if u know what I'm SAIYAN.

What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?

If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.

You’re looking pretty rough this evening. You look like if sweatpants were a person.

If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.

If Carlsberg did wheelchairs...

Adin, you should consider eating pencil lead, you fat cat lover, only if you're the new Adin from FF though xoxo da babby.

I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...