If jokes

So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

It worked really well in my local hospital.

If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.

(If you see this joke with a blue "S" that's also me. I just have an acc now.)

If your name is Jack, I think you are a stupid person that leaves their friends and blocks them on everything.

If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.

"Sonic Says", "If you're ever bored and have nothing to do, then just punch an orphan in the face. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?"

How do you know if a snowman is a girl or a boy?

A: Snowballs.

Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.

If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?

Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!

If you think about it, then adoption is the last choice for getting a child, so those who are adopted were the last choice.

My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."

If your sis makes you mad, so go to your friend's home to play.

If your sis is sad, go tell Mom.

Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?

Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.

Mom: It's time for sleep.

Baby: Is that what you think, huh?

Mom: *gives baby pacifier*

Baby: Nice try, hobo.

Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.

*few hours later*

Baby: *still awake*

Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!

Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.

Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?

Me: Me.

Friend: *does nothing*

(x_x)

I forgot that I don't have friends.

(Only Ninjago fans understand XD)

If you look outside and it's really windy, it's really cloudy, and the sky looks greenish... you better run, 'cause it has to be Morro!

Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.

I once asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite... He said, "NaBrO."

If laziness was an Olympic sport, I'd come in fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.

I was in class doing sex education. We were learning about sexual stereotypes.

My teacher turns to the class and asks, "If anyone could tell him what a sexual stereotype was?"

So I raised my hand and said, "Asians have small penis." He looked at me and said, "Very good, but I was looking for a definition."