If jokes

If you think about it, the 9/11 memorial is literally just a scoreboard.

What do you do if a woman is choking? Pull out a few inches.

If you are a bully at a school, when you get home, find an orphan and beat them up!

What are they going to do? Tell the orphan lady to tell you to stop? 😆😝

Imagine if Joe Biden was elected for a second term.

He would be the first president to be assassinated by a slick bathtub.

If you drop something, make your short friend get it.

If she’s old enough to breed, she’s old enough for me.

My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."

"Sonic Says", "If you're ever bored and have nothing to do, then just punch an orphan in the face. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?"

If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?

Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!

Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?

Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.

If your sis makes you mad, so go to your friend's home to play.

If your sis is sad, go tell Mom.

Mom: It's time for sleep.

Baby: Is that what you think, huh?

Mom: *gives baby pacifier*

Baby: Nice try, hobo.

Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.

*few hours later*

Baby: *still awake*

Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!

Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.

Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?

Me: Me.

Friend: *does nothing*

(x_x)

I forgot that I don't have friends.

(Only Ninjago fans understand XD)

If you look outside and it's really windy, it's really cloudy, and the sky looks greenish... you better run, 'cause it has to be Morro!

I'm bone dry in material, but I have a skeleTON of skeleton jokes. After I tell you all these rib ticklers, you will have a bone to pick with if you didn't find that funny, you outta rip my spine out.

Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.

I once asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite... He said, "NaBrO."

If you have a friend that will not leave you alone about something, just simply tell them: "If you watch something, have you ever thought that you're in a movie when you watch a movie?"

What can you do if you can't bear sharing the same blood as your father who raped you?

Have a blood transfusion.

I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.