If jokes
Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a male. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.
My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Me: Demon Slayer.
My teacher: Why?
The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!
If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?
Me: No.
Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.
If the minions serve whoever is the biggest bad, then who did they serve 1930-1945?
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?
Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.
So, my friend and I were talking this time. I asked them what they would do if they ever met Rengoku. They said that they would probably like shake his hand or something, but I said I would lick his forehead. Wtf?
Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.
If you donate one kidney, everybody loves you, and you’re a total hero. But donate five, and suddenly everyone is yelling. Geez!
Bestfriend @3am: I love you.
Me: Love you too.
*wait whatttttttttttttttttttt*
I don't know if this is funny.
What do you do if your online friend wants to commit suicide? You can't do anything, he's already on line.
Girl: Hey.
Orphan: Hi.
Girl: Wanna be friends?
Orphan: Sure.
Girl: Ok, and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over.
Like if you know an orphan.
Police: Where do you live? Child: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live? Child: With me.
Police: Where do you all live? Child: Together.
Police: Where is your house? Child: Next to my neighbor's house.
Police: Where is your neighbor's house? Child: If I tell you, would you believe me?
Police: Yes. Now tell me. Child: Next to my house.
Police: ... Child: 😊
Police: *Proceeds to beat the life out of the child*
If a homeschooled kid kills his parents, is it considered a school shooting?
How many beans are there in Irish chili?
Answer: 239
Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?
Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."
I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.
Has anybody else noticed that out of nowhere there are always tons of people online? It's kinda trippy if I'm being honest.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan.
What are they gonna tell their parents?