Identity jokes

Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”

Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”

Why do you never see gay people in wheelchairs?

You can’t be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.

What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?

Both are lying when they say, "I'm a real boy."

Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.

He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."

I've asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far, no one has given me a straight answer.

What do you call an emo girl with a flat chest?

A cutting board.

What do you call an autistic person? Names.

I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.

I asked my friend what the best gay joke is, and she said "You."

What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E.T.?

E.T. eventually went home!

Frenid: R u gay?

Me: Yes u

Frenid: No I am bi.

Me: Dang it!

Frenid: What?

Me: I like u.

Frenid: Ok I like u to.

I think I'm a red zebra!! Cuz I'm stripped red, iykwim.

Knock, knock.

"Who's there?"

Not your dad.

The brain named itself, and when the brain realized that it named itself, it was surprised.

But maybe, it was a spelling mistake and the brain wanted the name Brian. We all have a little Brian in us!

How do you get a nun pregnant?

Dress her up like an altar boy.

"How would you describe yourself in three words?"

"Lazy!"

So, you're into pronouns? Let me she/them titties.

What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...

The lines on the pride flag look pretty straight to me!

What do you call a gay guy on fire?

LGBBQ

Hi, I am just wondering who went into my account, 'cause I've changed my password, by the way.