Identity jokes

Hi, I am just wondering who went into my account, 'cause I've changed my password, by the way.

There are only 2 genders: if you have a dick, or a pussy.

What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.

I made it, DON'T COPY!!!

Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.

BTW, I am one, wahahaa!

What do you call an orphan's family picture?

A selfie.

Ever heard of account stealing?

Ever heard of someone by the name of "#SHUT THE HELL UP GWEN DON'T EVEN DATE PRINCE ON FACE BOOK!!!!!!!! I HATE IT WHEN UR HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"?

You know what's so horrible about this website?

When I mimic another person's account, the picture ALWAYS changes color. No more identity theft for me.

I'm the joke.

Why do gay people only stand crooked? Cuz they can’t be straight.

My middle name is Brian. I was so proud of being able to spell my full name till someone pointed out "Johnny Brain Walker" was incorrect.

What did the barbwire say to big foot? "My name is Jeff."

I went to the tattoo shop and asked for a skull.

A Jewish guy behind me said, "A skull? Back in my day, we could only get numbers!"

What do you call a shadow?

Tyrone, don’t be a coon!

What do you call an autistic black man with a rifle?

Black ops.

I work in a garage, and yesterday a gay person came up to me and said, "Why won't my car go straight?"

When an African has a twin, your me??

Dad: Ok son, if you fail this test, you're no longer my child, ok?

Son: Ok dad.

AFTER TEST

Dad: Hey son, how'd the test go?

Son: Son?

Please don't make a joke about me; I'm just a human.

What's the difference between an orphan and Spider-Man?

There's no way home.

What’s it called when an orphan takes a selfie?

A family photo.