Humor

If you boil your funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock.

I am funny.

I can tell you a pun about a pencil, oh! Never mind, it’s pointless.

What time do you have when an elephant sits on your fence?

Time to get a new fence!

Why did the rapper become an astronaut?

To drop some BARS in SPACE!

I would like to make a Minecraft joke...

It would be too plain.

How can you tell when a comic passes gas? Something smells funny.

What's the difference between you and your mom?

I slept with your mom.

I’ve seen more life in a bowl of WEEK-OLD GUACAMOLE than in BLESSEDBRIAN’S jokes.

If Slade were any more SENILE, he’d be pH 7.

Why do Indian men marry fat women?

How long does it take to blow up a baby in the microwave?

I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate...

My jokes are cancer.

Timmy: *grabs box of Trojans*

Daddy:...

Timmy: Well come on diddy!

Daddy: Well shit lets go son!

Both: YEE YEE

SWEET HOME ALABAMA

Why did the kid named Jeff become gay? Because he grew up without a father figure. Hahaha, I love dark humor!

What a world we live in. Now we’re making jokes about anorexic people.

Stop making jokes about cancer... I might sound like a Karen, but it’s not fair... My mum died of cancer last month, and still I cry nearly every night 🙏🏻

What do McDonald's and priests have in common?

They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns.

What do you call the midget sea?

A pond.

Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.

Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."

Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______

New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.

Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."

Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.