New Teacher: "I was an orphan as a kid."
Students: "OOF"
Teacher: "Is anyone missing?"
Students: "Your parents."
Who needs April fools..
When your whole life is a joke?
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.
Surveys say that 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea. That means the 5th one likes it.
if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
Guys, we should stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents will get mad. Oh.... Wait... Continue.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying, "ten babies in one trashcan." Morbid humor would be saying, "one baby in ten trashcans."
I believe "Self-Babtism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt"
My mom ask stop making joke about suicide I answer- don’t worry ...I stop soon
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?" Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."
All these jokes are plane wrong. My uncle died in 911. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.
So my parents were telling me about this dark joke they made 17 years ago, but they didn't actually tell me the joke.
What do you call an orphan's family reunion? "Me time."
I got kicked out of a hospital once, I told all the COVID patients to stay positive.
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either really terrible news or really great news.
Dark jokes are like water some people just don't get it
They say people are 75% water But I'm 100% useless
Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except Abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.
An old teacher asked her student, "If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?" The student replied, "It is obviously past."
