Humor
Why are there gates on a graveyard?
Because people are dying to get inside. Lol
I'd make a farming joke, but I'm just a little less than corny enough.
What did the suicidal leprechaun say?
"Irish I was dead."
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bone."
"Bone who?"
"It's nice to meet cha'. Can we be friends? I'm bone-ly here."
Chuck Norris can make Minute Maid lemonade in 5 seconds.
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
How does a lady with stage 3 cancer introduce herself?
"Hey y'all, I'm Diane."
Your mom is fat, and that's a joke.
My girlfriend passed away recently.
At the funeral, everyone was shocked about it.
Still, even when dead, she is the best shag I've ever known.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: .....it...
Friend: No
Me: *smiles* GETS BEAT BY THE MISTRESS AND GETS SCOLDED BY THE MASTER!!!
Friend: Why are you like this?
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit, I forgot, but they're both locked in my cellar right now.
A pun walked into a room and killed ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."
Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"
Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"
Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."
Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"
Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?
A meringue-atang.
Looks like someone's funny bone's broken!
At night in the Nunnery, one Nun says to the other Nun, "Where's the candle?" The other Nun says, "Doesn't it!"
Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly!
Fortnite is good.
(Awesome joke, right?)
One day, I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" I said, "His parents."