Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."

Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"

Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"

Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."

Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"

Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."

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  • At night in the Nunnery, one Nun says to the other Nun, "Where's the candle?" The other Nun says, "Doesn't it!"

    One day, I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" I said, "His parents."

    How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?

    If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.

    My dad and I were talking and my cat left the room.

    So I said, "I guess she wasn't feline it."

    My dad said, "You've got to be kitten me, that was purrfect!"

    I said, "Literally."

    Highest level of insult by a girl by seeing a guy's dick:

    "I can shit bigger logs than that thing of your's" 🤣

    What did the Indian cheese say to the other cheese?

    "Tu cheese badi hai mast mast!"

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  • My wife is an optimist. Our first night together, she handed me a Magnum XL condom. I didn’t know what to do, so I made her a balloon animal 🎈🦒.