Humor
Wow, these cow jokes are moo-amazing!
My wife slept with another man and got pregnant. She told me 9 weeks later. I said it's ok and told her let's talk downstairs, so I pushed her down the stairs.
Dad: Hey son, wanna hear a joke?
Son: Sure thing, dad!
Dad: Your mother and I are getting a divorce. She found out that I was sleeping with the neighbor's dog!
Son: I don't get the joke, dad.
Dad: It's my life, son! My life is the joke.
Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.
Them: You're ugly.
Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.
Man, I had a joke, but it left and never came back.
So I was being robbed, and this guy had the gun to my head, so I told him he was holding it backwards.
The view is so much better without those twins covering the city.
Well, that was a blow up!
Why do emos like yo-yo's? Cos they get strangled by the string.
Define abnormal life.
Waking up every day living a sane life!
The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call “daddy.”
Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the beach?
Because she can’t hear the sea.
What do you call a spaceman’s willy?
A Shuttlecock!
Who are the fastest readers? The people who were in 9/11. They went through 91 stories in 1.2 seconds.
What do the Flintstones and the building next to the Twin Towers have in common? They both live next to the rubble.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RC-XD
My relatives always teased me during weddings, saying, "You'll be next!"
But they stopped when I did the same to them during funerals.
My name is Mr. Cheese, but your jokes are still cheesier than me...
My name is Mr. Cheese, but your jokes are cheesier than me!
Your forehead's so big even Barry Wood said, "Wow, that's huge!"