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Humor

Humor

When I was teaching my dog tricks, a Chinese man came to me and asked, "Why were you playing with your food?"

Me: Wanna hear a joke?

Person: Sure.

Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.

Person: Dear God...

What is the difference between an orphan and a blind kid?

They both can’t see their parents. 😂😂😂😂😂

What's it called when a Black person makes a joke? A joke, you racist.

JK, dark humor.

I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.

So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.

That’s the punch line.

What's the difference between Clark Kent and chicken noodle?

One is Super. The other is just soup.

Latias is red.

Latios is blue.

You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.

Woman gets pulled over by a cop.

Cop: "Ma'am, have you been drinking?"

Lady: "No, officer."

Cop: "What's that in your cup then, ma'am?"

Lady: "Just water, officer."

Cop: "Looks like wine to me."

Lady: "Oh my god, Jesus did it again!"

One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.

What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.

If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.

That one really *crashed and burned*.

By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.

Enjoy!