What did God say to the black person?

"Oops, I burned one."😳

Not racist, just funny.

How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s penis.

A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

I went to a feminist picnic the other day.

It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.

Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.

Mom: Witherspoon.

Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!