Humor
Your hairline is so far back even The Rock Johnson couldn't find it.
The trip from your eyebrow to your hairline costs $6000.
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isn’t it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."
If you run next to a car, you get tired, but if you run behind it, you get exhausted.
I'll be here all week... sadly enough for you.
When someone calls you gay, say:
"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"
What is the only place fat people live?
Obi-city.
People dream about having a lot of money, but the only thing you should be dreaming about is a hairline.
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.
Ok, so I have a joke for you, go look in the mirror and when you realize, come back to me and tell me.
I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.
What did MLK Jr. say when he spent the night on the internet?
"Last night I had a meme."
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Me: Knock, knock.
Another person (OP): OP: Who's there? Me: Hatch. OP: Hatch who? Me: Bless you =) OP: But I didn't sneeze. Me: You just don't get a joke, do you?
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
What did the cannibal do after eating all the vegetables?
Sold the wheelchairs on eBay.
Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo
(Them) I 2 poopoo
(You) I 3 poopoo
(Them) I 4 poopoo
(You) I 5 poopoo
(Them) I 6 poopoo
(You) I 7 poopoo
(Them) I 8 poopoo
And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”
What should I write a joke about? Name the subject, and I’ll make a joke about it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Queen.
Queen who?
You don't know the queen? You're crazy!