Hows jokes
No matter how much I cry, the white people still left me hanging.
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?”
Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!”
Chef: “Why thank you.”
Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!”
Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."
(Phone call) This is Frank's funeral home and grill, where yesterday's grief is today's beef. How may we help you?
Kid 123, how's downline Orphan what? Home! 😂😂😂😂😂 Sorry.
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
She asked:
"How can you explain a yellow color to a blind man?"
What did the parents rearrange the furniture to punish a child?
Guess he was a stupid blind motherfucker 🖕 that didn't even know how to use a cane to figure out where they put the furniture.
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!
So many things are going through my head.
How am I not dead yet?
How did Capetian Hook kill himself? He wiped his butt with the wrong hand.
How many skinny people can fit in a tub? I don't know; they keep slipping down the drain.
A blind man handed me a piece of paper. It said, "⠊⠋ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠉⠁⠝ ⠞⠗⠁⠝⠎⠇⠁⠞⠑ ⠞⠓⠊⠎ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠁⠗⠑ ⠛⠁⠽."
I have no idea how he knew.
How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
How do you call a very good lemonade?
Fantatastic!
How do you know when a joke has turned into a dad joke?
When it leaves you and never comes back.
Kid me: I lost my stick.
Teacher: No, you didn’t.
Kid me: How do you know that?
Teacher: It’s hanging out of your pants.