Hows jokes
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
How old do you have to be to drink? Any age.
How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?
They slash them.
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
— Don't ask me. How should I know? I'm just the drone pilot.
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?
How can a guy do stand up comedy in a wheelchair?
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?”
Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!”
Chef: “Why thank you.”
Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!”
Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
(Phone call) This is Frank's funeral home and grill, where yesterday's grief is today's beef. How may we help you?
No matter how much I cry, the white people still left me hanging.
Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."
Good Lord, any tips on how to kidnap children? I say, "Free candy," and they run.
How do you call a very good lemonade?
Fantatastic!
Kid 123, how's downline Orphan what? Home! 😂😂😂😂😂 Sorry.
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
How do you make an emo mad at you?
Cut the rope.
How do you scare a lot of people in New York?
Open a mobile hotspot named "Delta Inflight Wifi."
How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."