Hows jokes
Billy: Hey kid, why are you sad?
Orphan: Oh, I'm waiting for my parents.
Billy: Oh, and how long have you been here?
Orphan: About 200 years.
How do you end an argument with an emo? Kick the chair.
Me: How do cowboys say hello?
Friend: Howdy.
Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Q: How do you punish a blind person?
A: Give them a gun and tell them it's a hairdryer.
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
Memes
How do you make an emo mad at you?
Cut the rope.
Good Lord, any tips on how to kidnap children? I say, "Free candy," and they run.
How do you surprise a blind guy?
Say, "Surprise!"
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.
How do you catch an elephant?
Act like a peanut.
How does a train dance?
It bogies!
A man got pulled over, and the policeman had stepped out and said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
The man said, "I was trying to catch up with the traffic."
The officer said, "There is no traffic."
The man said, "Exactly, that’s how far behind I am!"
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?
A: All the good guys are hung.
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
Teacher says, "Okay class, today we're gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up." Little Johnny, how about you go first."
Little Jonny: "I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"
How often do emos go swimming in a lifetime?
Just once.
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol?
Special forces.
How did the chicken 🐔 feel after escaping the fry cook?
Clucky!