House

House Jokes

I remember locking my door, but then I went downstairs to hear someone say,"I'm inside your home.". I said,"GTFO my hous BICH!"

Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her on the act and gave away my location from the noise

A farmer had a donkey and a dog one night he was getting robbed by a thief the donkey told the dog to bark but dog refused so the donkey brayed very loudly that the thief rin out of the house and the farmer beated up the donkey

Shut the fuck up u fat bitch u always like to roast others but u cant walk up the stairs whithout passing out u fat stupid bitch and i caught you break into someones house just to steal a peace of candy fat ass bitch.

Heres some of my weird jokes: What are rhinos? They're unicorns that let themselves go. Joke # 2: Why do triangles try every angle of it's house? Because it's in its name. Joke # 3: Wanna hear a cheesy joke? Sorry, the mouse got to the cheese 1st.

Riddles not jokes

What has 4 legs but cannot walk?

What has bark but no bite?

There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?

What has holes but can carry water?

What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?

What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?

What can you catch but not throw?

and last one

What can rule, but not command?

Tell meh the answers in the comments

like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/

1 more thing: DoN"t google it or search it up, use ur brain to answer these.

THE TUPPERWARE PEOPLE CAME TO OUR HOUSE. THEY ASKED MY WIFE WHERE'S KITCHEN. SORRY I HAVE ONLY LIVED HTERE FOR 3 MONTHS. BUT MY JEWELRY IS UP STAIRS IN MY JEWELRY BOX LOCATED IN MY BEDROOM

Have a sink in your house? Eat it. Have a mouse in your house? Kill it. Have a child in your house? M I C R O W A V E I T .

...

just kidding now watch this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5tjtUFL0j4

Why did the Chicken cross the road? You:Why? To get to the little b***h's house! Knock knock! You:Who's there? The chicken (this is more like a roast and a pun lol)

I was kissin my gal when the phone rang. I awnsered it and it was a prank. I walked into the room when my girl had sex with me. Then we cumed the house full XD

Ps free sex at my name

Momma's House-By-watersharky Productions and Dustin Lynch- I see your face on every street, every corner, couple trees Even got her name on 'em I feel your love, I hear your laugh, got them take me way on back Hurt me memories, I don't want 'em Up and down the boulevard In and out of every bar I'd burn this whole town down Pick a spot, dig a hole, put them ashes in the ground Baby, I'd burn this whole town down If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house Damn girl, why'd you have to break it like that Leaving pieces of my shattered heart scattered like glass I'd burn this whole town down If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house I would start it where we started, at the downtown party Where you kissed my lips and stole my beer The city park in the dark where we looked up at the stars Watched them fireworks pop last year It started under that Texaco sign where you said goodbye I'd get some gas and drop a match right there I'd burn this whole town down Pick a spot, dig a hole, put them ashes in the ground Baby, I'd burn this whole town down If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house Damn girl, why'd you have to break it like that Leaving pieces of my shattered heart scattered like glass I'd burn this whole town down If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house Fire red flames, sunsets in the sky Going out, staying in, staying up long nights Now I'm waking up alone, wishing I could move on Blocked your number in my phone, thought it help but it don't I'd burn this whole town down Pick a spot, dig a hole, put them ashes in the ground Baby, I'd burn this whole town down If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house Damn girl, why'd you have to break it like that Leaving pieces of my shattered heart scattered like glass I'd burn this whole town down If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house