Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?
The damages are severe.
What do hospitals do when they receive donor organs? They organize them.
Robert Smith walks into a hospital. The nurse says, "We have the cure!"
What happened to the gator when he walked into the hospital?
He became Gatorade.
Why can’t mental hospitals have Halloween?
Because the patients thought the pumpkins were them. I tried.
There was a guy who got his whole left side shot off.
When he was at the hospital and he woke up, he asked the doctor if he was okay.
The doctor said, "You're all right now."
What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?
Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To eat Bob's arms.
Bob went to hospital and had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Bob.
Where do you take someone who’s been injured in a peek-a-boo accident?
To the I.C.U.
One day I visited my friend in a hospital.
I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"
Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.
If you were a fruit, you would be a fineapple.
If you were a vegetable, I would visit you in the hospital.
One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.
And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.
And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
Cancer
You know your doctor is gay when he asks you to touch your toes, and then you feel a rub on your back and a tickle on your anus.
So what is the difference between a real doctor and a doctor of philosophy?
One cures the sick and the other makes them sick!
Me: Mom, I think I need to go to the hospital.
Mom: OMG, why son?
Me: I don't know what's wrong, but every time I close my eyes, I can see.
Think about it, then spread LMAO.
Sometime ago I went to the morgue and asked if they took walk-ins.
Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."
