History jokes
Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.
I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!
Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?
Because they go down so well.
My true hero is the person who killed Hitler.
What was the last thing going through the minds of the people who jumped out of the buildings during 9/11?
Their ankles.
Don’t feel bad about this day because there’s a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
If 6 is afraid of 7 because 7 8 9, why is 10 scared?
(10 is in between 9/11)
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza.
They only got plain.
Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice?
Because it said "concentration camp."
Why did UK want Northern Ireland for more s***?
A Russian wedding should be called a Soviet Union.
Which tower is better at playing catch? The south tower, obviously. It caught 2!
Why did Hitler lose the war?
Because Göring ate every last airplane, tank, artillery, ship, and ammunition!
Q: Why was 10 afraid?
A: Because he was always between 9/11.
109 countries can't be wrong. Watch Europa: The Last Battle.
Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.
Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.
Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?
Why can’t dinosaurs clap? Cuz they are all dead.
What do you call a blind German?
A nat-zee.
Who are the fastest readers in history?
9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 10 seconds.
Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?