History jokes
What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?
The Furred Reich.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
Why can’t U.S.A or England play chess?
Because the U.S.A has no towers, and England doesn’t have a queen.
How do you know that Americans hate exercise?
9/11. How else do you explain hundreds of them jumping to their death rather than taking the stairs?
Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
What's the different when a little boy drops in Japan then and now?
When a little boy falls today he gets back up. But then everyone fell and never came back up.
Your momma is so old she has been a waitress at the last supper.
What's the square root of 2001?
9/11
What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white?
Alive.
Who was the first anesthesiologist? Hitler.
What was Morgan Freeman called before the Civil War?
Morgan.
What’s the difference between Anne Frank and Harry Potter?
Only one came out of the chamber.
I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"
Why are there no fat people in Japan?
Last time they had a "Fat Man," 80,000 people died.
What kind of pizza did the twin towers order?
Two large plains.
Why didn’t Anne Frank just finish her diary?
Concentration problems.
Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad?
Stab it twenty-three times.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims – they went 89 stories in ten seconds.
What is a snake’s favorite subject in school? Hisssssstory.
Why can't Americans play chess? They have no towers.