History jokes
A Chinese boy never met his parents after they were killed in WW2, so when he learned where they were buried, he quickly rushed there.
He sat down in front of their graves and prayed, "I want to see your face again, mommy..." A miracle happened; his mother rose up from the graves and hugged him.
The boy cried then said, "I want to see you too, dad." He looked at his father's grave, but nothing happened.
Suddenly, a Japanese soldier came up behind him and asked, "Were you looking for me?"
What does Helen Keller say when she touches a basketball?
Duhhuuughhhr.
Christopher Columbus: *Sees native Americans* Can I see your land?
Native Americans: Sure, just be care..........
Christopher Columbus: Boonk gang whole lot of gang shit.
Why can't dinosaurs talk?
Because they are all dead.
How do you make any salad into a caesar salad?
Stab it twenty-three times.
What was the Nazi racing tournament in 1943?
Gasar.
Heil Kyle!
How 9/11 Happened!:
Hey Bush, Truth or dare?
Who are the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims. 100 stories in 11 seconds.
A family of three, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie? It’ll be fun.”
“Ok,” the mom and son reply happily.
“Let me start,” says the son.
“Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom.
“I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son.
“Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom.
“You’re right!” He replies.
“I’ll go next,” says the dad. “I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.”
“Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son.
“The lie isn’t that you’re adopted,” says the dad.
The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.
A child was walking through the forest when a wolf jumped in front of him. The child saw that the wolf had no leg. He then became a terrorist and caused 9/11.
Who would win?
The laws of the Catholic Church which have been effective for over 900 years,
Or one horny Henry?
Do you know why the Royal family can no longer play Monopoly?
How do you think Princess Diana died?
...Too soon?
What's the difference between cancer and a Nazi? Cancer doesn't discriminate.
What had more brains than Hitler? The wall behind him.
What game did knights play most often?
Osama Spin Laden, dropping beats like the twin towers.
I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him...
Person 1: Did you hear the joke bout 9/11?
Person 2: No, but it'll probably crash and burn.