History jokes

You know, when women clean their nails with chemicals, no one cares, but when Hitler tries to clean Poland with chemicals, everyone goes crazy.

What do you call a bunch of people near each other?

The start of the Hollacoast.

What was the last thing that went through JFK's mind? A bullet.

I was rooting for Donald Trump to be president.

We haven't had a presidential assassination in a while.

My favorite sex position is the JFK:

I splatter all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food??

Neither have they.

What was Jim Jones' favorite drink?

Killer Kool-Aid.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?

Licka-lotta-puss.

Why is the Champs d'Elysees in Paris lined with trees?

Because German soldiers like marching in the shade!

Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.

Two of my grandpas died in WW2.

Their tower fell over.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

9/11.

9/11 who?

You said that you would never forget!

You know what the yin and yang looked like before Martin Luther King Jr.?

There was none, it was all white!

I wonder if [I] would have rekt Hitler in a 1v1 build battle in Fortnite.

What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?

They're both Headless.

Hippity hoppity, Hiroshima, Nagasaki.

Did Jesus die a virgin?

Of course not, he got nailed before he died!

What is black and white and red all over?

JFK

Why did Hitler get hit by a car? Because he did Nazi that coming!

What did one statue say to another statue? "Hey! Is that you?"