What is Alan Turing's reincarnation doing?
Getting revenge for what some people said about him being gay.
Where is Rex the dinosaur? In the ground.
Once a knight was called a "kuhnigitt," that's because he was one!
Where did the king hide his armies?
In his sleevies.
Worst joke ever.
Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?
Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.
That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
Taig
Why were the victims of 9/11 so mad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was a plane.
I speak for the trees.
*Trees whisper in my ear*
They said six million wasn't enough.
Why was going through JFK's head when he was getting assassinated? A bullet.
You wanna know why the Titanic was split in half? The iceberg hit it from the front and back.
Which president has never gone to jail?
Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?
Q: Why did the chef get fired?
A: He took cooking advice from Hitler!
Free blacks in the Civil War is the same as me drawing a reverse card in Uno.
What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center?
Two large planes!
It was not a hijack, it was Stephen Hawking.
The last time I had flying lessons, I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...
No one:
Literally no one:
Abraham Lincoln: *dies*
John Wilkes Booth: *ranks up*
America once was known as an Obama nation. Now we're known as an abomination.
Why did Sellwood get named?
It is made of wood that got sold.
