Hey

Hey jokes

Mom

  • Hey guys, can we stop making these jokes? If my mom sees this, I will never see the sun again.

    Oh . . .

    :(

    Continue.

    Tuna

  • Hey y'all, you want to read something funny? Then look up "Greater Tuna" OID and read the script. It's the best. I'm performing it for an OID (Oral Interpretation of Drama) and it kicks ass. Check it out. Also, the name I'm using is my Roblox Username. Friend me.

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  • Boss

  • I got to work.

    Ben: Oh no, my boss is here. I hate my job and I'm terrified of my boss.

    Ben: Uh, hey, hey Mr. Boss.

    Boss: Have a nice day.

    Ben: Ok, bye!

    Boss:??

    Depression

  • Hey, how ya doin'?

    Well I'm doin' just fine, I lied, I'm DEAD inside.

    Don't tell me "it's gonna be alright," I've tried, but I can't fight like this.

    Hey how ya doin', I'm tired but I'm trying to fight.

    Nickelback

  • What did the 90s rocker Space Engineer in multiplayer Miner yell at the Troll stealing his stuff?

    "Hey! give me my Nickelback!"

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  • Song

  • Hey guys, starting tomorrow, I will put one letter of the "doin your mom" song every day. Can I finish the song?

    Also, I might be in Fortnite, hehehehehe.

    Kid

  • I see a kid crying in the park, right? So I go up to him and say, "Hey, where are your parents?" and he says, "Well, my dad left to get the milk and never came back, and my mother died in a plane crash in the Bermuda Triangle."

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  • Finger

  • My grandma said, "Hey, you want a Butterfinger cause I do?"

    Me: Grandpa's in the kitchen if you want a finger.

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  • Depression

  • Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.

    Pedophile

  • A pedophile was holding a bag of chocolates and then approached a little girl at the park.

    "Hey little girl! If you give me a teeny-tiny kissy-kiss on the tip of my wee-wee, I'll give you a piece of my chocolate!"

    The little girl replies, "If I suck your whole cock, can I have the whole bag?"

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  • Canoe

  • A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost. As they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air, and men with spears are there.

    One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So, what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy, so we will let you choose how you die."

    The man from France said, "Bring me the poison."

    The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun."

    And the man from New York said, "Bring me a fork."

    The guy was confused with the fork but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the Queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said, “MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU FUCKERS!”

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  • Road

  • Little Johnny was walking down a dirt country road, and he came upon an old farmer leaning against a fence looking sad, shaking his head. He walked up to the old farmer and asked him what's wrong. The old farmer said, "My mule, he just won't do nothing. He don't work anymore, always looking sad, barely eats, just sad." Little Johnny said, "Can I go talk to him?" "Sure," the old farmer said, "he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went back in the barn, saw the mule just sad, and sighing. A few minutes later, Little Johnny came out and said, "Your mule is fixed." The old farmer ran in, and saw the mule laughing, just rolling, and crying laughing. "Thank you, thank you," the old farmer said, and Little Johnny was on his way. Well, a few days later, Little Johnny was walking down the same old dirt road, and came upon the old farmer again, looking sad. "What's the matter?" Little Johnny asked. "It's my mule again. Ever since you talked to him, he won't do nothing, he won't work, just laughing all day. What did you say?" "Can I go in and talk to him again?" Little Johnny asked. "Sure," said the old farmer, "he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went in the barn and a few minutes later came back out. "Your mule is fixed, sir." The old farmer went in and saw the mule crying, crying really hard. The old farmer came running out of the barn, "Hey boy! What did you say to my mule? One day he's sad, then laughing, now he's crying. Just what did you say to my mule?" Little Johnny smiled and answered, "Well, the first time I told him my dick was bigger than his; this time I showed it to him."

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