My friend: Hey, why u always smiling? Me:Cuz life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
deku: hey todroki are you done with your Halloween costume todo: yes*comes out in a macaroni outfit deku:wha- im todoroni bakugo:omfg im out *blows up ua*
This my first joke on here I know it sucks. I tried.
I asked my friend "Hey did you get a haircut and she said no" and then I'm like really then why are you bald today.
Hey Prince, Let's chat here ok? Love you!
Hey, pass me that crow bar please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home
(credit to Ryan Lombard (I think that’s his name) from YouTube shorts, I loved this dad joke/pun)
Hey, I met you like way way back, just like your hairline.
my mom said hey come over here and I responded to late mom
Me: Know one likes shrek he is just a fat green guy friend hey stop talking about me
Kid: hey mum why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: shut up son you’ll wake your father!
Orphan: Hey wheres the milk Dad: . . .
Hey, do you like nuts? try our new product, deez nuts! *slam dunk* its a bag filled with all of your favorite nuts! We called it deez nuts! *slam dunk* we got cashues peanuts wallnuts! And its called deez nuts! *slam dunk* try out deez nuts *slam dunk* now! Its a bag, filled with your favorite nuts! Deez nuts! *slam dunk*
A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The penguin asks the polar bear,"hey, can you pass the soap?" The polar bear obliges. A few moments later, the penguin asks,"hey, can you pass the scrubber?" The polar bear does. Shortly after that, the penguin says,"hey, can you pass the rubber ducky."
The polar bear, beginning to become upset, turns to the penguin and says,"What do you think I am? a radio?!?"
Nasruddin Hodja was tilling his patch of land when a hunter came riding up.
“Hey, you!" said the man. “Did you see a boar run past?"
“Yes," replied Hodja.
“Which way did it go?" demanded the man.
Hodja pointed in the direction in which the boar had gone.
The man rode away without a word of thanks but he was back within minutes.
“No sign of it!" he said. “Are you sure it went that way?"
“I am certain," replied Hodja. “It went that way. Two years ago."
Me: Hey, mom? Why do we celebrate birthdays?
Mom: Because that's the day a new life was born, and people are born every day so every day is a special day.
My thoughts: And my friend wonders why I have depression...
Someone:hey are you a skeleton? A skeleton: course, I have a SKELE-ton of fans
Hey babe!
Hey cobalt cant. But tin can ;)
Oh Hey guys do u know I saw a guy with dementia oh hey guys do u know I saw a guy with dementia oh hey do u know I saw a guy with dementia
Hey I Broke up with ur girl -Me What Why? Wait what? -Me u Facked Her So its ur Baby
Hey guys, I just wanna say I say what happened to Kanye, he is one of my favorite rappers and he’s going through a hard time. I don’t see why people can’t just spread love and kindness like me💕
I think that Kanye was right to say what he said, I completely support him and I don’t understand why people hate on him for using his 1st amendment and Yeezy should be sued for it.
Quote of the day: love bests hate as for hate is the killer of friendships-Collin Kaepernick
