Her jokes
"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.
That's what Elliot Rodger did.
She said you can twerk, so I put her in a tractor and put her to work. She got mad at me and said, "There's no good men," but I gave her a kob and equal pay!
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
Don't treat her like a gold pump when she's treating you like a gray pistol. Put down a launch pad and rotate.
Yo mama so fat, her cheeks are in different time zones.
it all makes sense now 😮😮😮
If her age is on the clock, she can sit on my cock.
My wife told me to treat her like a princess, so I got drunk and drove through the tunnel.
Ur mum so fat that when she walked into a bar, they said, "Sorry, we don't sell food here."
Roses are red,
Potatoes are brown,
Your mom's so hot,
I put her down.
Why did the blonde have sex with a Mexican?
Her teacher told her that she had to do an essay.
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
Why do horny, deaf girls wear tight pants?
So you can read her lips.
An eight-year-old girl struggles to breathe as she lies on a hospital bed and waits for the doctor to come. After the doctor comes, he pulls his cock out of her mouth, and she can breathe much better.
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”
“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”
Found this girl in Hawaii.
Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."
A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"
She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"
He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."
A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"
She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.
He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"
What are chocolate's preferred gender pronouns?
Her-she.
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
What do you call a lady with a pyramid on her head?
mummy