Height jokes
My friends were really annoying me at my birthday party, so I decided to pop a balloon to spook them.
Maybe going on a hot air balloon ride wasn't the best idea.
What do you say before you jump off a building?
Parkour!
My brother called me short and ugly, so I called him an ambulance.
If a midget does meth, does he get high or get medium?
Some marriages can make short people look like Shaquille O'Neal.
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
I’m a short joke.
I’m only five feet tall 😞
Yo mama so tall, she eats paramedics.
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Why did the midgets laugh when they run?
Because their balls dragged along the ground. 😅😂🤣
How tall does the grass grow in Germany?
Zis high!
Midget
Me: *Calls friend* "Dude, I just fell off a 50-foot ladder!"
Friend: "Bro, you ok?!"
Me: "Yeah, lucky I only fell off the first step!"
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
You're so short, you have to yell to talk to people!
Boy: "My girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her..."
Off the nearby cliff.
A pilot is having a talk with one of his passengers. The passenger asks, "Why did you become a pilot?" The pilot replies with, "To face my fears." The passenger then says, "You're afraid of heights?" "No, I'm afraid of dying alone."
My teacher asked everyone how tall their grandparents were. I responded, "My grandpa is 5ft 10, and my grandma is -6ft."
I'M SHORTTT!
I got in a car crash with a dwarf one day. He came storming out, and glared at me. I lowered my window and called out, "So, I'm guessing you're not happy?"