Height jokes
If I went out with a dwarf, when I pick them up, I'll say, "Wassup short?"
I walked up to a man, and he said, "How's the weather up there?" and then I pushed him into the street to get hit by a bus.
Why are short people sad?
Don't judge though, it's crap but...
Because they couldn't reach happiness.
You're so short, when you were born, the doctor couldn't tell if you were a boy, a girl, or a Jimmy Dean pork sausage.
What's the difference between a guy and a woman? They fall from different heights.
I hate child murderers, they're always so high-pitched.
I don't always like to tell dwarf jokes. But when I do, I like to keep them short.
Whoever is reading this, I hope you have a good day because I feel bad you're so short.
An old lady was low on money because she had spent all of her money on clothes.
So she decided to go to the bank. She walked up to the guy at the desk. She asked if he could check her balance. He asked a few questions to the old lady, like her weight and her height. He asked her if she had done any exercise recently. She was very confused. She got angry and asked the man again to check her balance. So he stood up, walked next to her and pushed her over. He came to the conclusion that she had a low balance.
Why do dwarfs suck a cow's udder instead of being breastfed? Because they are too short.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
It's only okay to beat up a dwarf when they walk up to your wife and say, "Your hair smells nice."
Why are midgets short?
'Cause they are!
You can't be short and depressed because you are compressed.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Suck dick.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Suck a big dick.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Give a blowjob.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Perform fellatio.
Why did Sally fall dead?
Because she was on top of a tower and fell because she had no arms. Hahahahaha!
Why don't midgets use tampons?
Answer: They are always tripping over the string.