If you hate what you hear from Nickelback, at least you can get your nickel back.
If you have to deal with the noise from Deftones... unfortunately, not only are you unable to obtain any refund, but you may have become permanently deaf.
Did you hear about the fire at Noelle's place? Her sister is a real Dess-ember!
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately he lost his case.
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids
Me: hey friend!
Friend: yes?
Me: What is the missing sense? Seeing, Smelling, _, Tasting, Hearing.
Friend: Touch
Me: what do u spawn on Minecraft always (jk only 99.99pursent)
Friend: Grass
Me: And you get?
Friend: Touch grass
Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump? Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
I will always remember the last noise i hear in my school, "oogga booga motherf****rs," click, boom
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Did you hear about Alicia's car accident? She was really drunk and all over the road Until she was all over the road.
Did you hear about the dyslexic wanna-be bank robber? He walked in and yelled "HANDS UP, THIS IS A MOTHER STICKING F##K UP! The lucky idiot got away because nobody could stop laughing!
An old professor’s class used, to begin with, a dirty joke. Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began. When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of wh*res in Newfoundland?” With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door. “Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.
She gets home eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something, not sure what she said the girl replies with "ok".
The young teen was gonna head to bed wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight she lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say "Hunny I'm home", she doesn't bother to say ok.
Later when she decides to sleep she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door that she lost her keys. :)
-Dark_Humor
Did you hear about the guys hole left side got cut off! But he’s all right now
no one wanted to hear my ocean puns, they said they were too fishy.
did you hear the one about the deaf person me: no thats because they caint hear so they dont talk
The sun is out and the peado vans are out. Parents, keep your kids away from ice cream vans. Once they hear the sound, you'll never see your kids again.
A Story:
I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heared scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police. But it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again. But this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby. Certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.
Sequel follows...
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
