Me: Want to hear a joke?
Friend: Sure.
Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me.
Friend: What's funny about that?
Me: Because the next day they disowned me.
Did you hear about the dead artist?
Too many strokes.
Did you hear about the man who backed into a meat grinder?
I guess you could say... he was a little behind on his work.
Who wants to hear the biggest joke ever?
My life🖤
Did you hear the one about the hills?
It was hillarious.
Hey, you wanna hear something funny?
An atom makes up everything. Half of this site contains this joke. Don't trust the internet, kids.
Two boys are talking on the bus.
Boy 1: I feel like I'm forgetting something.
Boy 2: Hey, did you hear about that school shooting last week?
Boy 1: Oh, that's right.
Want to hear an inside joke? I walked into a house.
Want to hear an outside joke? I walked out of that house.
wanna hear a joke about measurment... nevermind it would take to long
You can say what you want about deaf people...
Q: Did you hear about the Twin Towers?
A: No, what happened?
Q: Apparently, the design was fundamentally floored!
Want to hear a racist joke???
Donald Trump.
I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!
Do you want to hear a joke about paper?
Never mind, it's tear-able.
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!
Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?
That's okay. There is really no point to it.
Want to hear something that’ll make you smile? Your face muscles.
A man is watching TV and his wife comes down and says, "I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?"
Man, "Sorry, I thought it was the start of Eastenders!"
When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.
My friend Jimmy said his dad is exactly like Santa. I asked, "Why is it because he gives people presents?" Jimmy told me, "No, it's because I hear so many good things about him and how he's gonna come home, but never see him."
