Dirty Joke Jokes

Why is Santa's sack so big?

He only comes once a year

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?

She gagged.

Q. What’s white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?

A. Toothpaste.

Q. What's long, hard, and scary when you first see it?

A. Calculus homework.

You want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. You want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. You want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was the next door neighbor.

The teacher asks her class "What is sex?" and Little Jonny stands up and says "sex is the temptation caused by the sensation when a boy sticks his location into a girl's destination. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?" and the teacher fainted.

What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?

A cock sucker

What do you call an expert fisherman?

A "MASTER-BAITER".

You watch 50 shades of gray, and you turn gray in bed.

Sex is like math

You add a bed 🛌

Subtract the clothes👚👕👖👙

Divide the legs🪢

And pray you don’t multiply 👨‍❤️‍👨👩‍❤️‍👨👩‍❤️‍👩

You want to hear a dirty joke?

This guy and this girl were having sex when the guys boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick" His boss replies, "you don't sound sick" The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone

There were 2 guys in an asylum. One name Kenny and the other is Bob. The nurse went down the hall and saw Kenny act like he was packing his bags. Nurse said “What are you doin Kenny?” Kenny said “Going to Florida for the week.” Nurse said “Alright see ya when you get back.” Next day Nurse went down the hall again and saw Kenny laying down acting like he was holding a wine glass. Nurse said “What are you doing Kenny?” Kenny said “I am at the beach” Nurse said “Oh I forgot your in Florida for the week, see ya when you get back” Bob’s room was across the hall. Nurse went further down the hall and saw Bob on his bed jerking off. Nurse said “Goddamnit Bob what are you doing?” Bob said “Shhh, I am fucking Kenny’s wife right now, he is in Florida for the week”

For boys Life is a lot like a penis simple, soft, straight, relaxed and hanging freely......... then a woman makes it really hard😩😉😏

A lady walks in to a dentists office, sits on the counter and spreads her legs. The dentist says i think you have the wrong idea with that the lady replies; last week you gave my husband his false teeth now you can get them out

what is six inches, and has nuts, and is hard.

a sinkers bar

Q.What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?

A. A seatbelt.

what is the hardest part of a vegetable... The wheel chair

What did Ron put in his diary? I Her-mio-ne after I banged her last night.

What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

What does one saggy boob Say to the other saggy boob

If we don’t get some support people Will think we are ball sacks.…