Q: Did you hear about the Twin Towers?
A: No, what happened?
Q: Apparently, the design was fundamentally floored!
Hearing Jokes
Want to hear a racist joke?
Donald Trump.
I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!
Do you want to hear a joke about paper?
Never mind, it's tear-able.
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!
Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?
That's okay. There is really no point to it.
Wanna hear a joke about pizza?
Never mind, it’s too cheesy! 😅
Want to hear something that’ll make you smile? Your face muscles.
A man is watching TV and his wife comes down and says, "I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?"
Man, "Sorry, I thought it was the start of Eastenders!"
When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.
My friend Jimmy said his dad is exactly like Santa. I asked, "Why is it because he gives people presents?" Jimmy told me, "No, it's because I hear so many good things about him and how he's gonna come home, but never see him."
Wanna hear a racist joke?...
Donald Trump.
I’m so annoyed by those people who just believe in anything they hear. This is a conversation I had a few days ago.
Idiot: "The moon landing was faked! So unbelievably fake!" Me: "You believe in the moon? Stupidass."
Wanna hear the car joke?
Nah, it's too fast for you.
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
Wanna hear a construction joke?
Nah, I'm still working on it.
I will always remember the last noise I hear in my school, "oogga booga motherf***ers," click, boom!
A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."
Why can't you hear a dinosaur clap? They're dead.
Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?
Yeah, he Pasta-Way.
