Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?
Girl come hear my parents aren't home orphan mine are never
Q: What is the worst thing to hear your surgeon say?
A: Oops, I dropped my lollipop!
Did you hear about the baseball game between America and Ethiopia?
America - 8
Ethiopia - didn't.
What did the guy tired of hearing people joke about rape do?
He killed everyone on this f#cking website.
Did you hear about the emo kid in a wheelchair? Exactly.
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.
Did you hear the passengers on the Titanic invited Yo Momma and the Titanic crew said, "Man overboard!"
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
Poor guy really needs some space.
I can hear thunder outside, which I find weird since the lightning is on my arm...
Teacher: I was an orphan as a child Student: sorry to hear Teacher:is anyone missing today Student: Your parents
One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass, not breathing.
Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little Johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone.
Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning, and his dad was making a lot of mistakes. Suddenly, his dad screams, "Bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant, and his dad replied, "Aunts and uncles." Oh.
Next thing he hears is, “Dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks, "What's that mean?" To which his dad replied, "Uh, coats and hats." Oh. Next thing he knows, he sees his dad jumping around the bathroom yelling, "Fucking, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" "What does that mean, Dad?" And his dad yells, "Cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh.
Next week is Thanksgiving, and the doorbell rings. Johnny answers it and says, "Hey, bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, Dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey."
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one.
There were people having sex when it started sinking. Legend tells when you go near the ship you can see semen, and if you listen close enough you'll hear them moaning.
Now that's a hell of a ghost story!
You wanna hear a good joke, kiddos?
Gods being real. (Newsflash, all gods are manmade. THEY'RE ALL FICTION!)
Lostin Flowers14 days ago What are the four letters you don’t want to hear from a dentist?
I C D K
i can make a word with those \DICK
Did you hear of the guy who was sad about being in a wheelchair? He had that crippling depression.
