When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
Heard Jokes
If I had a dime for every time I heard someone say that F was the villain (Alphabet Lore), I would be rich.
Follow me.
I heard a noise, so I'm dead.
I heard that Uranus is pronounced "yuuranus," but it reminded me of urine! đ
Have y'all ever heard of dad jokes? Y'all hairline is funnier than those.
Hiii everyone, I heard from many people that they want to join the "stop orphan jokes" group. Who wants to?
So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.
The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"
Have you heard of the Xbox game Sea of Thieves?
See if these nuts fit in your mouth.
I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, âDonât bother sweeping him son, heâs been dusted for years.â I was shocked but not surprised.
A basketball player walks into a strip club:
"Hi, I heard I could bounce some balls here?"
Have you heard the joke about the paper?
Never mind, it's tear-able.
Why did the rapper bring a map to the recording studio?
Because he heard they were dropping TRACKS.
Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.
The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.
My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.
The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"
Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"
I heard P. Diddy got a job as a defensive coordinator.
Heâs used to penetrating aggressively.
I left a chunk of ice outside during summer. That was the first time I heard icescream.
I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.
"When I heard that not arguing or fighting in a relationship represents a lack of interest, that's when my girlfriend started missing her makeup box."
When Chris Brown heard he wasnât the only one to hit a woman.
Stop the cap.
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