What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years? A war of nutrition
Son:Mom, I did the test and I have cancer!
Mom:YOU HAVE CANCER?!
Son:Mom, as my zodiac symbol...
Mom:....
I made a AR that shoots boo boo bullets. It does poison time 10x damage. You have a very go chance of getting STD. Very good AR. Going for 100,000. Email: EatandDrinkbouls@gmail.com
timmy goes to the doctor and says theirs a crack in my butt doctor, Timmy their is a crack is everyone butt see
health commercials be like:
serious side effects can cause:
Nausea, Diarrhea, vomiting, chills, fever, Cancer, Diabetes, Aids, Clamedia, Lupus, Ebola, polio, Leprosy, Pulmanary edema, heart attack, heart falure, yellow fever, but worst of all DEATH
Me: Mom i think i need to go to the hospital ......Mom: OMG Why son ......Me: Idk whats wrong but everytime i close my eyes i can see
.....Think about it then spread LMAO
Why did the tamale go to the hospital. b/c estava malito :)
What do you call a cat with a live in doctorz?
An anemic, shrivelled cat with desperate attached owners.
What's brown and rather bad for your dental health? -A baseball bat
So this guy and his wife figure out that she has gotten pregnant. The baby is due March 31st. Well the guy is at work and he gets a call from his wife. She tells him she is going into labor. He rushes to pick her up, and once he is on the road he starts speeding. Eventually he hits another car and swerves off the road into a ditch. He wakes up in the hospital, looks around but doesn’t see his wife. He asks the doctor, is my wife okay, she was carrying my child. The doctor said the wife is fine and the baby is in good health. 10 seconds later he goes “APRIL FOOLS! Your wife is dead and your child has brain damage
why did the cucumber go to the doctor because he wasn't peeling well
please stop using this thread it is cancer
NORTH KOREA HAS ITS OWN NORTH KORONAVIRUS. IT STARTED THERE
My wife was going to have a abortion and I have cancer Ha Ha Ha
I thought it was funny
D NO DOCTOR START WITH A AND A+
Not a joke but theres no where else to post this , ( mainly this post is for the broke people w/o a gym ) . Did you know that the body can't tell if ur using weights? so lifting weights are optional . some beginner workouts W/O weights for like really weak ppls . 1. sit - up's 10 reps 2. push - up's 20 per reps 3. squat's 10 per reps 4. crunches 10 per reps
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks... "Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"
"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."
Do this on a calculator.
There was this girl who was (13) but she wanted to be (84) but she was (45) but the dr said (0) he said take these tablets (2x) a day but she took them (4x) a day and she ended up boobless
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully of him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying "I fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease. Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"
Ads for meds be like: Chloroform its Chloroform helps with itchy eyes :side affects may include Acute Flaccid Myelitis (AFM) AIDS (HIV/AIDS) Alphaviruses. Alzheimer's Disease. Alzheimer's Diseases (Spanish) Arboviral Encephalitis. Arthritis. Babesiois.Cancer Unintentional injuries Chronic lower respiratory disease. ... Stroke and cerebrovascular diseases. ... Alzheimer's disease. ... Diabetes. ... Influenza and pneumonia.
