Head

Head jokes

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Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.

I get so many things stuck in my head, though, unfortunately none of them were a bullet.

Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?

A boy's hairline is always in the back of his head, and its shape is like a check mark.

Little Johnny’s father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. He says, “Son, every time you do that, you kill an innocent baby.”

The next day, his father walks into the bathroom and catches him again. Johnny says, “Bow your head, Dad. Can’t you see we’re having a funeral?”

My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?

Me: No.

Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.

Why did the Headless Horseman get a job?

He was trying to get ahead in life.

Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"

If you think your life is bad, then people are discussing the gender of Mr. Potato Head.

Me: Do you ever just walk into a room and forget what you were doing?

Bank teller: [eyes wide] Uhhhhh...

Me: *scratches head with gun* Man, I hate it when this happens.

So, a man goes to church and is dipped in water three times by a Priest as he says, "From now on your name is Michael, and you will shed your sins of gambling and alcohol."

Soon after, the man heads home and rushes to the fridge to grab a can of beer. He turns on the sink and dips the beer can in the water three times while saying, "From now on you will be known as Not Alcohol."

"Police control! Have you been drinking?"

"Go Pikachu! Thunder Clap!"

"Did you just throw a hamster at my head?"