Halloween jokes

During Halloween, my friend went as a skeleton.

He refused to go into the haunted house. Looks like he was SPINE-LESS.

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?

A tromboner.

I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, it's Election night.

So I stayed at home for Halloween when I suddenly hear a knock on my door. I open and I see Penandes! I was confused and asked him why he does not wear a costume, and he said he doesn't need to.

Then I realized that he's a ghost and gave him 3 candies. Enjoy the candies Pruno!

Boo! 👻🎃💀🕷️🕸️☠️ (So scary, right?)

What’s a witch’s favorite makeup?

Ma-SCARE-a!

What do Emos say when they trick-or-treat?

"Boo-hoo!"

Your momma is so ugly that she went out as herself for Halloween.

Well, tell her that Halloween is the best holiday because you can hide Easter eggs under the Christmas tree while eating a big Thanksgiving turkey.

I usually hang up Halloween decorations,

but this year I'm gonna be the decoration.

Will: Let's bring Hannibal a gift today!

Beverly: Yeah, I bet he’d love that!

Will: Yey!

Beverly: What should we bring him?

Will: *holds up a bucket and knife with an insane looking smile* Come in the bucket!

Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because he had no body to go with.

How long was the owl trick or treating?

Owl night long!

Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!

How do mountains get big?

They go trick-or-treating.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Terrier.

Terrier who?

Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!

I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!

I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!

Why can’t mental hospitals have Halloween?

Because the patients thought the pumpkins were them. I tried.

It’s almost take her to Spirit Halloween, and then rail her in a spooky mask season.