Scary Jokes

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What's the best thing you can do if you're feeling lonely? Watch a scary movie. You won't feel lonely anymore.

Dirty Joke

UrStepmom馃槒馃槒

Q. What's long, hard, and scary when you first see it?

A. Calculus homework.

Horror

Anonymous

I've just started reading my first ever Braille horror story and I think that something scary is about to happen. I can feel it.

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Hairline

Anonymous

Your so scary that even your hairline ran a way

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WHEN YOU FEEL LONELY JUST WATCH A SCARY MOVIE.

YOU WONT FEEL LONELY ANYMORE:(

Skeleton

Anonymous

what did the skeleton say to the other wow that song spooky scary skeletons really does send chills down my spine

Square

inside ur mom

i wanna tell you a scary math joke but i'm 2 squared to tell you

Daddy

FlawlessFlames

Child- Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Daddy. Goodnight Grandma. Goodbye Grandpa! Dad- Wait, why are you saying that? Child- I just felt like it The next day, the Grandpa is dead Dad- That's just a VERY scary coincidence. Child- Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Daddy. Goodbye Grandma. Dad- Wait, why are you saying that? Child- I just felt like it. The next day, the Grandma is dead. Dad- That's just a VERY scary coincidence. Child- Goodnight Mommy, Goodbye Daddy! Dad- Oh no. If I survive until tommorow, everything will be okay! Survives until tmmrow Dad- Whew! That was nice! *Goes to house* Mom- Honey! I was so worried about you! The mailman just dropped dead on our porch! (If you don't get it, the mailman is the biological father)

Sound

StOryTelleR

A Story:

I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heared scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police. But it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again. But this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby. Certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.

Sequel follows...

Dark Humor

Daniel

A young boy was picked up by a strange young man who put him in his car and drove into an abandoned farm 鈥淭his place looks scary鈥 they kid said And the man replies鈥 I know right, I have to walk out of there alone鈥

Minutes

UrStepmom馃槒馃槒

My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!

It's not my birthday but a scary-looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house

Dream

Kid: " Mom I had a scary dream can I come sleep with you and dad " Mom: " sure sweetie sleep in the middle " Kid: " Dad can you get the remote out of my back " Dad: " That isn't the remote "

*Weird background music*

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dadjokes.com

When your lonely watch a scary movie. You won鈥檛 feel lonely anymore.

Date

Anonymous

Why are there no women in the NFL? Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity. So the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch shed have to be?

Math

hey stepbro :;)

i wanna tell you a scary math joke but I'm 2squarwed to tell you

Emo

Anonymous

remember 2000 it was scary

Yo mama

Yo mama so scary, the government moved Halloween to her birthday

Texas

Anonymous

I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15 I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!

Nut

Anonymous

What鈥檚 a nut鈥檚 favorite scary movie? The Creature from the Black Legume.

Shooting

Class scaru

So I was at a class at school, and then boom explosion. lots of dead. I shoot at the peope too haha, goodbye class. Scary

Anonymity

Stephanie

Why do people think that monsters are scary? Cuz they are so stupid

Basement

Anonymous

Why are basements so scary? Cuz of the mail