Hair jokes

Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?

Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.

A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”

He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.

EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.

WebMD: Cancer.

I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?

UGLY!

A girl had black hair. Also, I threw rubbish at her to realize she wasn't a bin.

Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.

Omg wassup dude, why does your hair look just like a young Whoopi Goldberg from "The Color Purple?" Them damn stanky looking corn bread rows on your head; you look like a damn cheetah pet. Che che che cheetah, they available at Wal-Mart, Dollar Tree, Target, and Kroger.

What's Stephen Hawking's shampoo?

Head and Shoulders. 😊

Where do you mix a bunny and a hare?

Bunny hair.

Your hairline is so far back, a pilot thought it was an airplane.

Your hair goes so far back in time, even cavemen saw it!

Yo, your hairline so messed up God said your hairline on the cross getting hit on that cross.

pp hi

What’s a cancer girl's sex kink?

Hair pull.

You're so bald, the Hair Club for Men has elected you president.

Lilly's hairline was so fat that Charlene could not find it on Roblox.

Friends, who's your barber? They mess up big time.

Me.

You're just jealous because my dad cuts my hair for free, and you have to be paying 30 dollars just for that short-ass cut.

Yo, hairline is as accurate as my jump shot.

My mom wanted me to brush my hair.

And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...

Stranger: Do you need hair regrowth products?

Kid: No, my hairline is just far back.

Stranger: Do you need a doctor?

Dolls have wigs made of mohair, cancer patients have wigs of no hair.

A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.

The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.

The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.

The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.