Hair jokes
What’s the worst thing about having a sister with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
What’s the worst thing about having a wife with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
If a midget says your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer?
You can’t pull on her hair when you’re raping her.
ISIS recently brought out their own shampoo: HEAD AND SOLDIERS.
How do you describe a redhead with bad teeth?
Gingervitus.
Why was the bee’s hair sticky?
He used honeycomb.
What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barber-queue.
What's the difference between Donald Trump and Derek Vinyard?
A shaved head, a chest tattoo, and a moustache.
What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?
Slick her hair, she looks 15.
Your hairline goes so far back that it was getting whipped in the 1800s.
Why did the rapper become a barber?
Because they love CUTTING TRACKS!
Your hairline goes so far back you can see a full world scale map in your forehead reflection.
Emos,
They're always a cut above the rest.
What do you call a blonde who's dyed her hair brunette?
Artificial intelligence.
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
Stranger: Do you need hair regrowth products?
Kid: No, my hairline is just far back.
Stranger: Do you need a doctor?
Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”
Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”