Gun Jokes

One time Little Johnny heard his parents "wrestling" in their bed. So the next morning, he went to rape all the little girls in school. This then led to his demise. No girls told on him, but when he grew up, he was a raper. He never stopped. In total, "little" Johnny had over 31 sons that he didn't know about. When he was sentenced to jail, he raped all the inmates despite his small figure. He was then sent to the death sentence, "eagle wing" torture style. His parents were happy he died, and the morbid rapist was put down, never to return again. However, all the sons had his genes, including his MINDSET. They then became a cult and shot down 2014 cops, 471 military members and 72951 males and females. The kids, you ask? Only the males were spared, and taught how to operate the guns. All but 419 females were killed. They soon became the world's strongest empire. No one could stop Little Johnny's sons. NO ONE.

i a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer

I was at my boyfriends house and I thought he was cheating on me and he was on the phone with somebody he said he'd be over there soon. so i asked him if I could see his phone he said no and then we fought about until I seen his gun and because I thought he was lying to me I shot him,went through his phone and his friend was still on the phone.

guns dont kill people, black people kill people

My best friend was Was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one

Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday, he gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it. I asked him what was the bullseye for he said target practice

I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun now to the assault rifle.

What's the difference between a gun and a penis? The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.

Q/ how do you punish a blind person

A/ give them a gun and tell the its a hairdryer

why does aaron eat burgers on a wednesday? because his spine is bent and his favourite gun in apex legends is the g7 scout and he uses the speedy spanish man

My grandpa was the best soldier ever. He gunned down over 100 soldiers in his bunker during D-Day

Name what guns are used for {wrong answers only}

Q: why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns A: because knives dont have barrels

So put your best face on everybody, pretend you know this song everybody- *pulls out noose* 'COME HANG'... *pulls out gun* Let's go out with a bang... Bang- *gunshot*

Abracadabra! Alacuzam! See that woman? She’s now a man? After the man got some sun, I turned this banana into a gun! Now look! I now have your phone, Apple Watch, and your credit card!