Guess jokes

What did the parents rearrange the furniture to punish a child?

Guess he was a stupid blind motherfucker 🖕 that didn't even know how to use a cane to figure out where they put the furniture.

Why do orphans have no sense of humor?

I guess they've never heard a dad joke.

I wanted to play Fruit Ninja, but remembered I don’t have a phone. Guess I gotta draw fruit on my arm!

It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”

I guess you could say, “harassment something.”

I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.

A: What's the difference between a toilet and a washing basin?

B: I don't know.

A: Then I guess your house looks beautiful...

B: ...

What do you call a stabbed pig?

Porkchopped.

What is a pig's favorite Food Network channel?

Pork Chopped!

Hah, got 'em (I guess)!

Did you hear about the man who backed into a meat grinder?

I guess you could say... he was a little behind on his work.

I lost my job making storage units for the police after a week. I guess you could say it was a brief case.

I threw a dodgeball at a blind kid and got him out... guess I can say he didn't see it coming!

A Russian walked into a bar... Unlucky for him I guess, in Soviet Russia, you don’t walk into bars. Bars walk into you.

Guess why orphans can't play baseball? Because they don't know what home is.

So, apparently, Hitler's dad was quite the abusive fellow, always beating his son.

Guess that's why he's called (Hit)ler.

I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.

Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.

My step bro thought I was single and tried to take me, but I said, "I'm take." And guess what he did? He cried.

Why? Why would you do that?

So I guess Ice Cube was right, Eazy's dick smelling like MC Ren's shit, and Eazy died of AIDS.

They say birds of a feather flock together, so I guess that’s why Kris and common sense haven’t met yet.

My lesbian neighbors and my sister gave me a Rolex for my birthday. I guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted a watch.

Guess the joke.

Your girlfriend.

Guess why a lot of orphans were in "Home Alone"? Because their family left them.