Green

Green jokes

Frog

    • What is Green and Red and goes round and round?

    A frog in a blender.

    (this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)

    What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?

    One can support an average family.

  • 1

    • Meth

    • You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish.

    Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA

  • 2

    • Drug

    • Codenames for them FUCKING drugs, my crackhead ngas.

    Cannabis: Weed, Pot, Ganja, Herb, Grass, Mary Jane, Bud, Chronic, Kush, Trees, Hash, Hashish (concentrates).

    Cocaine: Coke, Blow, Snow, Dust, Charlie, White girl, Pearl, Nose candy, Rail, Sniff.

    Crack Cocaine: Rock, Hard, Nuggets, Dice, Jelly beans, Moon rocks, Sugar block.

    Heroin: Smack, H, Dope, Junk, Black tar, Brown sugar, China white, Horse, Dragon, Skag.

    Methamphetamine (Meth): Crank, Speed, Chalk, Ice, Crystal, Glass, Shards, Tina.

    MDMA (Ecstasy/Molly): E, X, XTC, Molly, Beans, Adam, Happy pill, Love drug, Dancing shoes.

    LSD: Acid, Tabs, Doses, Dots, Blotter, Window pane, Sugar cubes.

    Ketamine: Special K, K, Vitamin K, Cat Valium, Green K.

  • 0

    • Midget

    • Why do midgets have to wear a green bright jacket when crossing the road?

    Because they will get turned into a pancake even more.

    It's not funny, I know.

  • 4
    • Green memes

    Hacker

    • If Red gets voted out, what happened?

    Red is not voted out, Red is a hacker, so he kills Blue. OK, so someone found Blue's body. Red said, "Where?"

    Lime, Green, and Purple said, "How is Red not dead?"

    Red: "I am a hacker, you noobs!"

    Lime, Green, and Purple run.

    Red killed them all. Red is the win, but he is not the win.

    Black killed Red. Black is the win.

    LOL

  • 3

    • Zebra

    • What is black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

    Three zebras fighting over a pickle.

  • 1

    • Roast

    • "This dude right here don't look nothing like no damn Tyrese Gibson. He look like a hot, fishy tail termite all dressed in green makeup."

    Prank

    • Hey amazing people! The Prankster is back! This prank was on my sister and her friends. (tbh I did not think she had friends.)

    I set out some snacks for them! Btw (I can't be trusted).

    I gathered some "slapies."

    The things I gathered were tomatoes, onions, milk, carrots, ice cream, and some dried-out green beans! All that stuff!

    I need the tomatoes to make a sauce because I am going to put that with the ice cream, mix that up with the milk, yea yea it might look like a gross and nasty dish...WRONG!!!! I am going to make it into a little snack...anyway we make that into a snack for her and her friends. The onions are used to make their eyes cry and burn but I will give them a towel after that. The dried-out green beans are just to make them go over the top and overreact because I did not cook them. After that, we make it like it's not so icky!

    I feed it to them!

    They overreacted!

    Please leave a comment.

    Bye!