Great jokes
A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar.
These two have been great friends for over 20 years...play golf together...and meet every Tuesday at a classy bar for a glass of wine...talk about golf...good wine and spiritual matters. One day while at the bar enjoying a glass of merlot, the Rabbi raises his glass of wine and says to his long time friend.."brother, do you believe Jesus turned water into wine?"...the Priest thinks for a moment and raises his glass of wine and replies..."yes brother, I do believe Jesus turned water into wine...but don't get excited...since Jesus was Jewish, the wine was probably Manischewitz."
My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
9/11 was pretty great to me, it's just hilarious to watch people lose at Jenga.
My great grandpa killed Hitler.
Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.
All they will talk about is how great their family is.
If one of ya'll could find my weave, that'd be great!
You can assume a horse is called a great jumper when the horse’s name is “Polo Neck”.
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
I was just fine being bisexual... Now I’m gender fluid... great...
My grandfather is a great fisherman, especially at baiting a rod.
I guess you could call him the Master Baiter.
When you find out your great grandpa killed Hitler.
"You did great!"
"Come here and get your prize, a shiny quarter!"
"Nah, that's okay."
"Here's the quarterback."
"You don't want the quarter?"
"No! Quarterback!"
"Huh?"
(Crashes) (screams)
"Yo, sorry 'bout that."
"You think he's gonna be mad?"
"Who? Baldi?"
"Nah, he doesn't have a HAIR in the world!"
(Annoying Orange laughs) (Baldi groans)
I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend when suddenly a man took all of our bowling pins! I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant. I instantly realized it was Penaldo!
My father died in 9/11. It's such a shame. He was a great pilot. 😔
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning,
It's great being a sniper.
A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...
As an honest Penaldo fan, I have to admit he is a penalty merchant. He can only score against farmer teams like Spezia. He never shows up against great teams like Barcelona.
I've come to realize my hero Penaldo will never be better than Messi. My idol Penaldo is sadly finished.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"You have a great singer inside you."